Home Toddler How do I stop my toddler to want to be carried?

How do I stop my toddler to want to be carried?

by ines.wurbs@icloud.com

Parents love to carry their babies. However, this can change in infancy. The children are getting heavier and so carrying them is more strenuous. Parents want their children to be more independent, and sometimes it seems inappropriate for the situation. You’ll learn why kids love to be carried, and I’ll show you some simple tricks to get your child to walk independently.

Why does my child want to be carried everywhere?

Carrying is a natural way for parents to interact with their children. Children feel safe in many ways.

  1. Our children have plenty of physical contact, and often even skin contact. They can still feel the warmth and cling to it.
  2. They can hear your breathing and heartbeat.
  3. Furthermore, they can sense our smells. Our children mainly recognize smells.

This all calms our children down and makes them feel safe. For a long time, we humans depend on the help of our parents and caregivers. It is our nature that we need security. Our babies are soothed by this security. By seeing people, they know through many of their senses, they feel close and safe, and the need is satisfied.

When your child has new experiences, the need for security increases. Noise from visits, shopping malls, or loud music, for example, is exciting for babies. The sense of hearing gives our babies a new perspective on the outside world. The increase in our babies’ need for close proximity is not necessarily bad.

But even small children have an increased need for security due to the many new experiences they make. Other types of discomfort, such as flatulence, can also cause an increased need for closeness. Our children are thus distracted from discomfort and can calm down more easily through closeness and warmth.

The stepping movements of the wearer make it easier for children to be calm. It’s similar to rocking and has a calming effect on children as it’s repetitive and distracts them. This helps the brain make the transition from an activated state to a quieter state, and it activates brain waves that induce sleep.

A study by Hunziker from 1986 found that babies cry 43% less when carried.

Should babies or toddlers be carried?

If there are no health considerations for the mother, father, and child, of course, there is nothing to be said against it, provided that it suits everyone involved and is perceived as pleasant.

Benefits of Carrying

It has some advantages, of course.

  • Helps with gas.
  • Helps prevent skull deformities caused by lying on one side.
  • Prevents hip dysplasia
  • It strengthens the bond.
  • Low-threshold communication and security are achieved.
  • Helps children develop their sense of touch and movement.
  • They are allowing for more freedom of activity for the carrier.

Disadvantages of wearing

  • Some carriers feel uncomfortable with their movement.
  • The child and carrier sweat more.

Concerns to carry

  • Some parents worry that baby carrying is terrible for the spine. However, according to research and studies, this is not the case if the baby carrier is used properly.
  • In a US study, death from suffocation was only found in stretchers that placed the infant in a prone and hunched position. When you carry the baby, make sure its chin is not on its breastbone and the carrier does not close over its face. If it does, there is a real risk of suffocation.

Carrying aids

Baby carriers make carrying easier. But they also have a big advantage that when used correctly, our children sit safely and comfortably. I also like that I have my hands free, which has always been a big help for me. 

Useful tips if your toddler wants to be carried everywhere

We’ve heard a lot about it. It is exhausting to carry a child from infancy. It is due to their greater weight that they are, and it is also due to the restricted freedom of movement that many complain about. What can you do to get your toddler to stand on his own two feet more often?

Convey security

Children want to be carried because it makes them feel safe and close to someone. We have to give our children alternatives in order to be able to fulfill this need for security. Providing support, for example, is a good idea. Alternatively, they can bring their favorite toy or something similar with them. A lot of cuddling before and after can help. In this article, I have summarized different ways of showing security to your child.

Set routes

When going for walks with your child, agree on a certain point beyond which they should be able to go on their own or when you will carry them. It’s best if your child knows what you mean. Choose something unique. Time specifications are possible, but they’re still too abstract for small children to do anything with them. You can agree on a number of things for your child to see before they are carried.

Bring in creativity

Increase the motivation to be more active by playing creative games. If your child experiences something exciting along the way, we prefer that the route be covered on foot. The hops step, mini steps, giant steps, stomp, sneaking, and even a race are examples of different gaits. In the winter, searching for clues is very popular. Balance bikes and scooters can distract our children from being carried, and it usually has a particularly motivating effect on them.

Discuss situation

If your toddler wants to be carried, it is a good idea to discuss the situation with your child. Even your toddler will be able to understand individual key points if they are explained in age-appropriate language. Tell your child what to expect. Your child will feel more comfortable in the situation because of this. Playing through or practicing certain situations with toys can also help.

Allow warm-up time

It is especially important when your child is interacting with people they are not familiar with, that you are available to them as a safe retreat. He/she should only be asked to explore his/her surroundings after a warming-up phase. If it doesn’t do it alone.


Give your child praise if they have made an effort. Tell your child what they did well, and show your enthusiasm for them. This will encourage your child to go farther on their own or to explore their surroundings on their own.

When should I stop carrying my baby or toddler?

It depends very personally on your own wishes and possibilities. There are no guidelines. The time of day needs to be adjusted. When small children are carried a lot, there comes a time when it’s too much for parents.

With your help, your child will first have to get used to the new situation and then develop tactics that will satisfy its need for security. If possible, start preparing your child in advance to be able to stand on their own two feet.


It should be a moment of pleasure for you both. Carrying has many advantages and can be achieved in other ways. As long as you feel like it, carry on. But remember to give your child time to get used to the change, and encourage and support your child during the changeover with the points mentioned above.

Reading tips

I have selected an interesting thesis for you on the subject of: “Does infant carrying promote attachment? An experimental study of the effects of increased physical contact on the development of attachment”

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